One of the most important concepts I teach my clients is the difference between the “fixed” mindset and the “growth” mindset. People with a fixed mindset believe that you have fixed qualities. Your intelligence, character, and personality are what they are, because that’s how you were born. They’re unchangeable. For example I am always going to be a chronic yo yo dieter because this has been my life long battle. People with a growth mindset believe that your basic qualities are things you can cultivate through your own efforts. Everyone can grow and change through application and experience. For example with the proper guidance and daily accountability I KNOW I can get a handle on my weight and live a life free from this obsession. Which one would you instinctively say resonates more with you? Its strange but the way most of us are taught we are mostly brought up in the fixed mindset at least that is how I grew up in school. You get a 95 on math, wow you’re smart. You get a 65 wow you are dumb. that sort of thing. This is how the majority of us approach dieting and health in general. We either “can” or “can’t” do it. There’s no in-between, there’s no emphasis placed on the process of learning how. You’re either skinny or fat, healthy or not, determined or lazy. When it comes to dieting and weight loss, a fixed mindset can be harmful in ways you’ve never even thought about. And I swear until I studied this I did not realize how important this is. With a fixed mindset, you aren’t supposed to need to apply effort. Success is about being better than others; effort is for those who can’t make it on talent. The result? You live behind excuses. Effort robs you of all your excuses. “Of course Susan is fit and trim, she doesn’t have to work! I could lose the weight if I didn’t have a full time job.” or of course If I had a chef like all those celebrities I could eat right. You get the gist. With a fixed mindset you are not a work in progress, you are a finished product. And finished products have to protect themselves. For example in my own personal life with my struggles with addiction I never ever thought I would live pass 30. It was my fixed mindset. I am just one of those unfortunate ones who therapy, rehabs and AA doesn’t work. I mean really how can it work I have tried everything. But see I really hadn’t because the 9th or 10 rehab did work because I was ready to do the work. With a growth mindset, its all about the effort and that is what brings the success You think things like: “I know I’ll master my diet eventually because I’m committing to putting in the effort, day after day. I know that if I focus on the process over the outcome – if I focus on making healthy choices instead of losing weight – I will lose weight. I see it happen time and time again.. So I know it works. But its also about changing how we thing. WE CHANGE WHEN OUR SHOULD BECOME MUST. That is what Tony Robbins calls raising your standards. Everybody knows they should eat better, be on time , get off Facebook and exercise. whatever the case maybe but until those should’s become MUSTS it will never happen. The fixed mindset believes failure if you fail its over. You want to hide every time you ‘mess up’ on your diet because you don’t want to be judged or labeled as a failure. For example: “I was overwhelmed at my friend’s birthday party and gave in to the pasta and wine and cookies. I suck. I can’t do this.” The growth mindset believes failure is worth investing in, because that’s how you’ll learn and improve for a similar situation. For example: Yeah so what I had a few glasses of wine and pizza on sat.. but I am ready to kick it into high gear today and moving forward I am going to allow myself one cheat meal because this works so I don’t feel deprived. I also think If I eat an apple before I go to the party next time I will have more control of my hunger.. you see what I am getting at? With a growth mindset, you want to find out WHY this happened and how you can learn from it and you will just keep on progressing. With a fixed mindset, everything has to be perfect. This was my thought process for year. Every day I am going to wake up and do one hour of cardio then lift weights and track all my food. Duh sooner or later this is not going to be sustainable and you will quit. Get what I am saying this perfection kind of thinking will either saying I’m all in and it will be perfect of screw this I can’t do it let me go back to my old life style. How many of us do this? We fantasize about how perfect we’ll be, how this time is different. When that initial wave of motivation dies out a few weeks later, what happens then? Are you starting to see how important this is? Some more examples: In a fixed mindset, you attempt a restrictive and unrealistic ‘diet’ because you want to lose 10 pounds in a week without thinking of what happens after that. In a growth mindset, you want to change your life. You want to master your diet and improve your lifestyle. You want to become more than what and who you are now because you know you can. In a fixed mindset, it’s all about the outcome. If you didn’t lose 10 pounds in a week, it was all a waste of time and you’re a failure and this didn’t work, so nothing will. In a growth mindset, it’s all about the process. Yes, if you master your diet you’ll lose weight, you’ll be lean, and you’ll be healthier than you’ve ever been. But that’s not even what matters. What matters are the choices you make every day, the progress you’re making, and how fully you’re investing in becoming a better version of yourself. When I start working with a new client, they’re always eager for me to give them their new diet plan immediately. Before getting into the weeds regarding your fitness and nutrition, you’ve got to understand the big picture; you have to understand your mindset. The view you adopt for yourself profoundly affects the way you lead your life. Your mindset determines the person you want to be and whether you accomplish the things you value. If you don’t actively try to approach this dieting experience from a new perspective, it’s more than likely you will go back into old thinking patterns, which will promote old habits, which will lead you back to square one. Honestly this is why I am so excited to start this new aspect of my business. SO many people need coaching through these thought patterns and I mean daily. Even if its a short exchange via text these reminders are crucial to change your daily habits. and THEY WILL lead to success. You want a diet you can go to any nutritionist and get a diet, sure, but how can you stick to the diet that is where we all need help. Staying accountable, discussing the daily challenges, coming up with a plan for the sticky times when you feel out of control. When you master that on the daily you will get results.
